Thursday, March 29, 2012

One Last Moment With You

If I could have one last moment with you, I wonder what I could say that would make you understand that I love you. If I said the words, would you hear me? Would you see me? If I said I'm sad or if I cried out in pain, would you hear me? Would you see me? Would you even care?

"Busted Heart (Hold On To Me)"

What does it take for a person to realize the value of a friend, the value of family, the value of love? Would you miss me if I never made it home or if you never got the chance to hear "I love you?" Do you think about our memories and the days that go by? Do you wonder if I think about you? I do.

I think about all the hate and pain in this World and I think about Jesus and what He gave up, the pain in endured, for us, in order for us to live as sinners and to be forgiven. So much we take for granted, so much we don't see. He gave His life for you and me, and we don't speak. We are angry, we are hurting, we have been divided by conflict, by uncertainty, by words, by hate.

Why? Why? How can you not break? Whether it be separation of blood, love, or both, why does your flesh not bleed? Why? How? The pain in my chest, the pain in my throat, the anguish in my soul, pleases you, makes you feel good, makes you feel just, makes it worth your while. Why? How?

When I think about how you feel, I can only imagine that you're blank, you're over me, you've forgotten. You don't look back, you are pleased, you have won. I wonder what that feels like, to win, to feel accomplished for creating such pain. I must be weak, I must be abnormal, for I feel defeated, lost, confused, beaten, sad, incredibly sad.

If I could have one last moment with you...I would tell you that I miss you, that I forgive you, and that I love you.

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